Scott Baio Reality Television

What's Wrong with America Part 2

Submitted by: Jonathan Randall, New York City comedian

Remember the happy old days when Scott Baio looked up to the Fonz,loved Joni, and was on the cover of enough teen magazines to cover the rooms of every 16-year-old girl who ever dreamed of getting breast enlargements?

Well before you go and list that Chachi lunch box on E-bay and find those old Scott Baio records. Just realize that Scott Baio is 46 and exploiting his unborn child and past celebrity to be relevant in today's reality obsessed world.

After spending over a decade clinging not so much to his past glory as a sitcom star but rather to the fact that he was a guy who nailed Pamela Anderson, Heather Locklear and countess other sluts, Baio proves that all washed up actors need to do when they cant get work is star in a reality show about how pathetic they are cause they cant get work. After all the only thing we Americans love more than a star is a
fallen star. We love to rubberneck the train wreck until it is so horribly disturbing that we actually start to feel better about our lives.

The second season of Scott's reality show is currently airing on VH1, which has gone from playing crappy music to airing reality shows starring people no one even really cared about when they were famous. The show follows as he attempts to deal with the trials and tribulations of getting married and having a baby when you are rich and irrelevant. On one episode TV viewers got to watch a sonogram of Baio's unborn daughter, making her the first fetus reality star… and you thought your mom showing people your naked baby pictures was embarrassing. I am glad that Scott is giving his daughter a head start on becoming the coke-snorting stripper she is destined to be.

Watching the show you would almost think it was all scripted, but after viewing one "Charles in Charge" rerun you will realize Scott is not that good of an actor. The main plot of the show is that Baio is having a terribly hard time accepting his new role as a soon to be husband and father. Apparently the only thing that will ease the transition from being a douche bag to being a douche bag with a wife and kid is his own reality show. It is riveting television that really makes you wonder what Boner from "Growing Pains" is up to these days.

When looking at Baio's body of work its hard to believe that Baio was once so popular that he got his dick wet in every hot wannabe actress and playboy playmate that that had a subscription to Tiger Beat. Today, "stars" like Paris Hilton and Lindsy Lohan wouldn't even let him pick up their herpes medication. The only good thing that could come from a reality show that reminisces about being a misogynistic
scumbag and complains about not being ready for fatherhood is hope for Joey Lawrence. Hopefully this will be the last we see of Baio, but with the ridiculous amount of crap on VH1 don't be surprised if the show goes on for another 30 years when it be will called Scott Baio is 76 divorced, decrepit, and trying to get in the pants of his daughter's friends.

What's Wrong With America?

I'm here in New York City and just finished the Inman conference. There's a lot for me to report. When I get back to Aventura, Florida I'll be writing several posts about the event and what I've learned. I need a few days to let the information settle in my head. Check back to see what's posted next.

In the meantime, I'd like to announce that during my trip in New York City I met up with comedian Jonathan Randall. He does stand up all over New York. He has agreed to start a series of posts called, "What's wrong with America?"

Here's what he has to say....

When you grow up with Britney Spears as your older sister it is hard
to get attention. Just when you think you might grab the spotlight
Britney shaves her head and tries to beat up an SUV with an umbrella
or flashes her vagina for the world to see. Sure you might have a hit
show on one of televisions biggest children's network, but your big
sister had a public marriage with one of the most talentless piece of
crap in the known galaxy. Actually calling Kevin Federline crap is
really not fair to poo. He is more like the poopoo that gets stuck to
the side of the bowl after you flush, and the next time you use the
toilet you have to pee at really hard to try and get rid of.

Poor Jamie Lynn the only way to get attention in a family built on lip
singing and tabloids is to get pregnant at 16, Britney might have done
and continue to do allot of screwed up things but she can never get
pregnant at 16. Finally, advantage Jamie Lynn, their mom must be so
proud. After all mommy Spears will probably get a percentage of the
Million bucks OK magazine is paying for pictures of the baby after its
born. That's right a million bucks for having a baby at 16, finally
teenage pregnancy is cool and profitable. I'm sure if she has a
miscarriage one of these soul sucking, lets rethink the whole freedom
of press thing magazines will cough up 100 grand for pics of the dead
fetus.

But wait there's more! Getting knocked up at 16 wasn't enough for
Jamie Lynn oh no when you have to compete with Britney's level of
dysfunction you need to bring it. According to several news outlets
the father of the worlds most famous fetus is not the 18 year old the
Spears family claims, oh no he is just a hired stooge. The real dad is
an executive on Jaime's cancelled show Zoey 101. That's right
Nickelodeon has pedophiles on the pay role, hey no one knows kids like a child molester. Congratulations Jaimie you officially reached movie of the the week status. We will probably see your story on Lifetime this year starring Lindsy Lohan's little sister.

Where does all this leave Jamie Lynn's fans? Well those under 17 can ditch Sex Ed 101 and follow in the foot steps of their favorite tween queen by getting pregnant. Thanks to Jamie Lynn teen pregnancy is as trendy as Uggs and over sized hand bags. The older fans who were OK with masturbating to a 16 year old will now have to decide if stroking it to a pregnant 16 year old is just going to far.

WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO SAY.... let us know.

Aventura Florida get ready to LAUGH

South Florida's very own Jonathan Randall is coming home and he is bringing the laughs. Jonathan has been living in NYC performing comedy since he left the sunshine state and has established himself as one of the most innovative young comics in the NYC scene.

His energy, originality, passion, quick wit, and ability to walk the line have made him a comedic force to be reckoned with. He starred in and created the cult hit live comedy extravaganza "Chasing the Dragon," which was part of the New York Underground Comedy Festival.

He has been on Sirius Satellite radio, can be seen as a host for the Internet sites TVTONIC and TITAN TV. He has written for MTV and several of his own comedy shorts, which he also directed.

He was featured in the Andy Kaufman Awards for the first New York Comedy Festival, and appeared on its TV special that aired on ABC and Comedy Central. Recently he wrote and directed "The Sherwood Inn Commercial" which was featured on NBC's
Late night with Conan O'Brien.

While back in his home town Jonathan will be performing at the West Palm Beach Improv on Nov 15 @ 8pm and at the Miami Improv on Nov 21 @ 8pm. Check back on the blog for more showtimes coming soon.

Check him out on Myspace @ http://www.myspace.com/jonathanrandall